The Overprotective of my enemy.

Sitting here in the hall ways of time itself, a campus building of white walls and blue hallways I see the shadow of a hypocrite, I see the source of all the problems and the clear path to the exit and solution

Today I repressed myself, the first time for ignoring myself, the second for ignoring the situation and the third for hesitating.

Keep your friends close but your enemies closer – anon

Today I handed money to a person I genuinely have lost respect for, but something prevented me from not stopping myself and I ask myself am I stupid, am I an enabler, am I just doing something nice or am I just being a good person.

A lot of that is really difficult to answer when you find yourself constantly reminding yourself how much of a terrible person you really are, and the multiple things in the past that you’ve done good and bad, that seemingly cancel each other out, you could almost say it’s the universe balancing itself out,

It feels strange almost hypocritical of me to think The universe can be pretty unfair, I can deal with unfair but people, they can be cruel. To be a cruel person you have to have intent to hurt people, you have to have a hole in your heart the size of  your fist.

I’ve spent about half the day setting my head straight for the evening and I’m certain, there are people like me who will make sure to bring out your best, even if it means verbal warfare and passive aggressive post it notes ideally without – and that alone should be enough inspiration to make an attempt with people.

I maintain one thing – You always get treated by how you act..

Again more than usual, this is an open letter to myself, it’s my way of releasing the negative valve in my life, but to give the post some context and maybe give some people something to think about, just because your experiences have been terrible, it shouldn’t give you an excuse to be a terrible person, just because you are going through a terrible time, doesn’t give you an excuse to give other people a terrible time, just because you did something terrible to one person doesn’t mean other people should have to do the same terrible thing.

There are a lot of people that need to unplug themselves, leave to a quiet place and learn about themselves instead of disassociating themselves and those around them with irreversible behaviour that leads to mental disorders..

Get help, if this in any way offended you.. talk to a professional, this is writing from the heart and addressing the root of my problem, at the very least, do the same.

How to Avoid the Works of Procrastination

Giving yourself a task to do is difficult, it exacerbates the notion of staying relaxed and results in negative thought patterns, “ugh I have to do the chores” and “ugh I have to do work” and “UGH I have the percolation assignment to do”

These are natural emotional responses to a natural dislike of a topic or subject,

Believe me – I have had my fair share of the “procrastinations” – the last minutes, the overdues, the long awaited.

But. There is nothing worse in the world than the guilt left behind on being reminded, the utter feeling of disappointment that is installed after thinking “I had all that time”, “I could have just done it”, “Why did I need reminding?”.

STOP

Take a breather. and Think for a second.

 

 

Here, I’m hoping you will have found some form of an answer, or at least formulated a question that can lead to one.

 

1. What Causes Procrastination?

Procrastination is the lack of motivation to start, or finish a task, whether it’s house work, school work or just over-all adulting – You can procrastinate on the smallest thing without ever realising it.

Need the bathroom? Stop procrastinating and go.

2. How can I avoid Procrastinating?

Really, Honest response, you can’t – You can always catch yourself in the act before it’s too late and then respond to the misdeed *silent judgment intensifies*.

But to avoid giving procrastination a reason to slip into your day-to-day,

Clean your House/Room –  uuuhhh OK? UwU

Any philosopher, therapist, counselor will say the same thing,

Your house is like your mind, if your home is a mess, so is your mind.

Retain Law and Order – that sounds difficult I’m not a specials victim |: /

Welllppbecause it is difficult… If you’re Single, you’re out there, on your own – and you invest your time in yourself and your interests and those of your friends.

Be Productive – how productive is productive?

Interests.. an Interest can be productive or unproductive, can you play an instrument for example , if not? Why not >_>

Are you a designer? an Artist? a Developer?

Is there some concrete thing in your spare time that you ALSO enjoy doing that you COULD be doing instead of __________ , where this blank is the first interest that clicked that is eating away at your spare time.

Reward Yourself – rewards are nice, but what’s the quest!

Let’s play a currency game, multiply 24 by 60  you should get 1440, and subtract the number of hours you firmly believe are spent sleeping (10 min), doing daily tasks (2), then travelling (0-3), shopping(1-2), school(6-8), college(8-10), assignments(3-5) etc, then  subtract the number of hours participating in an activity without any productivity by 60 from that number.

This number represents your money minutes, and they are worth alot, I mean ALOT.

You probably only have about 300 money minutes per day taking all that into account

Say you decide on playing a Game for an hour, that’s cool.. but at some level it needs gauging between emotional release and a question of productivity. Shouldn’t you be Studying??

Yes, Yes I should be, but this makes it the perfect opportunity to show an example of productively spending money minutes on something I enjoy to do.

Spend no more than 60 money minutes and it deserves a reward

I genuinely Turn a profit, by constantly getting things done that need doing, I’ve discovered that I have extra money minutes lying around.. 30 here, 120 there, and suddenly I have all this time that I don’t know what to do with..

On some off days I find I’m short, mainly because of the mess in the place or I’m just feeling a little more tiring than usual, perfectly normal for me, isn’t nice, but still I find ways.

Create a distraction Free environment, a computer at a table is all you need, putting games away, consoles, etc. ban yourself. they are considered distractions, phones, apps, web browsers, after this last line close chrome,firefox/ other generic browser…

don’t be literal with your minutes – you are essentially just time keeping, and housekeeping your mind, and there’s nothing wrong with that..

 

 

 

Adam and “The Wiggles”

I think this is an important post for alot of parents that have autism children, not only because it’s a struggle and a strain on relationships, but because of the general understanding of what is going on inside an autism child’s mind – ticking a pound (lb) to a dozen – (12 lb  = 1 dozen lbs for those curious), I (Personally) – call them “The Wiggles” – that unforseen moment where any child is peak to a nuclear meltdown but doesn’t understand what is genuinely happening!!! Continue reading

Autism, Kids, and The Life Controller

Autism is a huge word to me, it has had an incredible impact. To the extremity that has narrow visioned the people I know perspectives of how a child with autism can, could, would, should be parented.

I can say that with the experience of being an uncle at a young age and been the middle child of a large “adopted” family – I have had the privilege of being an active role in looking after babies, children and teens from the age of 2 (The age I became an uncle) to 30+ (because I like to keep people guessing).

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24 Hours to Positive Living

This is more of a reminder to myself than, a “How-to” Positively Live.

Step 1. Wake up, every morning at the same time.
Step 24. Go to Bed at the same time every night.
Step 2. Remember to Eat at least 2 meals a day, avoid stress eating.

Step 3. Start the day as if You have exactly 24 hours to live, and at the end of it, have no regrets. The worse thing you can possibly do in life, is to survive,

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The C Word We All Hate – Compromise

So without going into details.. What is compromise..
Compromise is the selfless desire in sync with another’s selfless desire.

This Compromise can be anything, a dinner, a plan, an arrangement, a schedule change, pick one.

I struggle with Compromise but at the same time, After a lot of student projects and butting heads with other students and other people in general. I know where to draw the line and where to overstep the “boundary” when conceived as not a compromise.

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Life in that “Social Place”

So, I’m kinda sitting here in front of the keyboard asking myself, where am I.

I’ve put my few months down to an identity crisis, and have beaten it the best I can… It’s all anyone can do, You included.

A few days ago, I flicked through my journal and found myself thinking about a place, in the irrational sense of the word place, somewhere that exists, that doesn’t exist, confusing right?

I know.

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